"Everything that can be counted does not necessarily count;
everything that counts cannot necessarily be counted." - Albert Einstein
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
More Global Warming Mathemagic from NOAA
Oh, really? According to whose math? NOAA's? Are we to just take their conclusions at face value, knowing full well that NOAA and NASA and the IRS and all those other government agencies are part of The Global Numerological Conspiracy?
I challenge NOAA to prove it. PROVE to us, the American taxpayers, that 55.84 is a HIGHER number than 54.9. PROVE it, NOAA! Show your work! Or do high-level governmentocospirator mathemagicians somehow get a pass when it comes to PROOF?
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
Bernie Madoff: Just Another Alternative-Math Martyr
In just the latest example of the mathemagic-government conspiracy against alternative calculation beliefs, Bernard Madoff is now being sued for "fraud." And as usual, the liberal media has bought the math-lobby's cover story hook, line, and sinker.
This latest salvo against the math skeptic community has been launched by a group of so-called "victims" of Madoff's so-called "Ponzi scheme" who claim to have "lost" about 7 billion so-called "dollars." Yes, perhaps that's how it looks to the pencil-pushing accountants who willingly submit to the "consensus" math hegemony, but to we alternative-math believers Madoff's investment was a stellar success.
His "victims" profited handsomely in alternative-math terms, and the lawsuit being brought against Madoff by this sorry bunch of ingrates shows how deeply-entrenched the math conspiracy goes. Shame on you, Fairfield Greenwich! Shame on you for persecuting those who refuse to submit to "consensus" calculation.
FREE BERNIE MADOFF!
Sunday, April 05, 2009
EARTHQUAKE ALERT: ITALY
Mars, which is already angered by the robotic rovers trespassing on her ruddy red surface, is probably going to be so angered by this new transgression that it will throw an earthquake at us, with devastating results.
I know you're all questioning the same question: where is the earthquake going to hit?
My astrologer sources point to the small town of L'Aquila, in central Italy. Now I know what you're saying: science can't predict earthquakes. And you're right - it can't. But pseudoscience can. And I'm not the only pseudoscientist predicting this earthquake. Italian seismologer Giampaolo Giuliani predicted earlier this week that an earthquake of earth-shaking proportions would befall L'Aquila tomorrow, using his patented radon-detection techniques. Techniques, I should add, that have been summarily dismissed by lame-stream science for the ridiculous reason that they haven't been proven to work.
Are our predictions correct? Only time will tell. But I'm pretty sure this isn't a drill - it's the real deal.
You've been warned, town of L'Aquila, Italy! Take heed/precautions!