The Computers Are Taking Over Our Minds!!!

I have been saying since the beginning that this "Internet" thing was going to cause the downfall of human civilization as we delegated more and more of our mind-function to the cloud. And now it seems that science has confirmed the rightitude of my prediction!

The studyists found that subjects who believe they'll be able to rely on computers to retrieve bits of trivial information retain this information less accurately than subjects who know they have to rely on their own wetware due to the inherent fallibility of technology:

...trivia questions were turned into statements. Participants read the statements and were tested for their recall of them when they believed the statements had been saved—meaning accessible to them later as is the case with the Internet—or erased. Participants did not learn the information as well when they believed the information would be accessible, and performed worse on the memory test than participants who believed the information was erased.

The implications of this study are frightening beyond all boundaries of terrifiability, to say the least.

While the Internet has admittedly proven useful in storing our value-added cat photography and organizing it for easy retrieval, it has been very un-useful in keeping our minds sharp in preparation for the coming computerpocalypse.

In fact, one with a conspiracy-minded sort of mind might be led to think that all these Internet conveniences and distractions are just a ploy by sentient routers and helper apps to soften up our brains and make us easier to - OMG look at the wittle puppy sleeping in his wittle basket!!!

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