Tuesday, March 09, 1982
WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!! (SYZYGY EDITION)
On March 10 - tomorrow - our solar system is about to become perilously unbalanced!
All of the nine planets - and a yet-to-be discovered comet named C/2010 X1 (Elenin) - are going to line up on one side of the Sun. The resulting disbalancement can and will be catastrophic for our planet! See for yourself by viewing the attached "graphic" image file (I apologize in advance for its size, and realize that it will take several hours to download over a 2600-baud modem, but this is important!)
As you can see, the planets and undiscovered comet are all on the same side of the Sun, a most dangerous form of syzygy. According to Dr. John Gribbin, author of The Jupiter Effect, the effects of this inbalanced gravity on our planet will be a veritable smorgasbord of natural disasters. Hurricanes, typhoons, earthquakes, volcanoes, tsunamis, you name it - one of these will happen tomorrow.
My prediction - and mind you, I could be wrong, as I tend to make my natural disaster predictions while drunk on grain alcohol and Clamato - is that there will be Magnitude 6 earthquake somewhere on our planet in the next 48 hours. Though I cannot say where with absolute certainty, my mind's eye is being drawn to Indonesia. Specifically, the Sumbawa Island region.
I could be wrong. I hope I am. But if not, I do hope the good people of Sumbawa will heed my warning and take cover!