Friday, October 02, 1992

Will The Real Human Candidates Please Stand Up?

We have reached the point in the campaign season when I make my impassioned plea on my gopher site to see the birth certifications of the candidates. Been doing it for almost a decade now with no success, but I hope this time my plea will be heeded.

Gentlemen, we live in dangerous times. Aliens from multiple worlds are anxiously awaiting the first opportunity to invade and enslave our planet, possibly by installing a pod-clone or android in the White House.

Not to alarm you all, but I have strong reason to suspect that one of you is such an android and/or pod clone. In the interest of fairness, I won't say which.

Oh, never mind fairness. It's Perot, ok? I'm pretty sure he's an android. Just look at the guy!

I hope I'm wrong. I hope I'll be proven wrong. Prove me wrong, candidates - show me your birth certificates.

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