Atheists, Pirates Declare War On Christmas

Although the liberals and other members of the rationalista might have you think otherwise, the centuries-old War On Christmas is a very real war on the most sacred of American holidays, Christmas. This very real war has some very real casualties.

The latest casualty in the War on Christmas is none other than Santa Claus himself. And to a lesser extent that Baby Jesus guy. A nativity scene in the quaint suburban suburbia of Leesburg, Virginia has been brutally attacked by pirates from the so-called "Church" of the "Flying Spaghetti Monster.". The nativity scene in question was vandalized to include marauding pirates and placing a so-called "spaghetti monster" in the manger cradle in place of the baby Santa Claus.

Outrage!

Another nativity scene, placed there by Atheists, doesn't feature any nativity at all, merely celebrating the secular Jesus Substitutes of Freedom and The Constitution.

Outrager!

The Atheists have taken full responsibility for the nativital vandalism, according to a selectively-edited quote from a news article on the incident:

"We’ve been ... trying to destroy Christmas, and that ... be ... the truth [, arrr, matey],” Rick Wingrove, the Virginia state director for American Atheists, told ABCNews.com. “There’s ... war on Christmas. If there were ... Christmas, I would have gotten a memo [from the Atheist Pirate King demanding my resignation for failing to prevent it. Arrr]."

This news has The Math Skeptic decidedly outraged. When will these Atheists and pasta-worshippers realize that the so-called "Freedom of Religion" guaranteed in the First Amendment applies to Christians only? Followers of incorrect faiths need to keep their big Jewish/Atheist/Muslim/Hundu/Zoroastrian/Jainist/Buddhist/Animist/Secular mouths shut from Thanksgiving through the New Year. The pagan traditions we stole to create Christmas are sacred, and other religions asserting their right to exist is nothing other than a brutal attack on Christmas.

Outrageous!

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