I had the most bizarre dream to-night!
Details of the dream are sketchy, as dreams are wont to be. However, I shall try to recall as many details as I can, as the dream seemed fortuitously prophetic!
As I recall, the dream began with a pair of young twins were riding a guinea pig - or maybe a canoe - along a beach. It was definitely some sort of guinea pig/canoe hybrid.
A bottle washed up on the beach, and one of the twins opened it. Suddenly, First Chancellor of the Republic of Germany Otto von Bismarck leapt from the bottom and grew to gartantuan size, jumping up and down on the beach and thundering the ground into giant waves. GIANT WAVES!
I awoke in a fitful sweat and attempted to piece together the details - the twins, the beach, the guinea pig, Birmarck. Then it hit me - it was an earthquake prophecy!
Hereby I predict that not one but a PAIR of earthquakes will strike in the coming weeks. They will be centered near Papua New Guinea in the Solomon Islands, which is situated along the Bismarck Plate!
So if any Solomonians happen to be on D.A.R.P.A.-net right now, I urge you to print out this warning, make as many mimeographs as you can, and urge your authorities and friends to take cover on high ground. Multiple earthquakes and tsunamis are headed your way